Waffles and Pancakes

19 03 2016

imagesimage from random Internet search. I did not make this image. (I have to say this because I have been threatened with lawsuits over prior art)

Pancakes and waffles are good.

We all know they’re basically the same thing. But there’s something about the waffle that’s just better than the pancake.

The thing is, you got your pancake batter and you got your waffle batter.  We know it’s the same thing but don’t make the mistake of putting waffle batter on a pancake griddle or pancake batter on a waffle iron.

Do something like that and  your messing with the whole space-time continuum thing. Open up a worm hole and send us back to the time when there were no waffles?  I can not abide something like that.  So be careful how you handle your pancake and waffle batter.  It’s not something to be taken lightly.  These are very important things to understand if you wish to succeed at life.


 

And I’m not talking about square waffles.  Square waffles are like the fast food of the pancacke /waffle experience.  Because square waffles come pre-cooked and frozen just to be re-heated in the toaster oven.  This is the McDonald’s of waffles.

While they are convenient I can not abide the pre-cooked frozen square waffle.

And any of you out there who  have a waffle iron that makes square waffles, trade it in for a round waffle iron.  Be cool and hip and circular like the pancake because squares are uncool, man

Which brings me to another waffle conundrum.  Even though we now are all in agreement that our waffles must be round, they would not be waffles if they were not made up of a bunch of small squares in a round configuration.

And that’s the difference between the waffle and the pancake.  Same batter, designated for different purposes, pancakes, round, waffles round, made of squares.  Man I just wanted some pancakes and waffles and now I’m doing geometry!

And there’s some thing about the waffle we all like better than the pancake, right? like it knows something the pancake does not. Like it’s just a little bit cooler than the pancake.  But what’s weird is, the cool waffle is made up of a bunch of uncool squares.  Because squares are uncool, man.

  • Sometimes I wonder which one Donald Trump’s hair would prefer. The pancake or the waffle. Because  on one level, Trump is kind of cool, like the waffle because he don’t answer to nobody but Donald Duck.  But on the other hand the waffle has a lot of edges and Trump never did no drugs or alcohol so maybe his comb-over prefers the less edgy pancake. It’s a no nonsense confection.  No edges no squares, just pancakes ready for syrupy goodness.

And what about the Belgian waffle?  What makes the waffle Belgian?? The fact that the squares are bigger?  You just thought it was because the squares were bigger but that is not the case my friend..

You could make a real small Belgian waffle with real small squares as long as there were only like four squares making up that Belgian waffle.  And of course, always, the tiny Belgian waffle is round and cooler than the silver dollar pancake.

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