I cut my hair

Here’s me growing my hair.  I was going to let it go for at least a couple of years then donate it to Locks of Love but I had to get back on the job hunt so I chopped it.  Here ‘s a vanity shot.  The gray is showing again now that it’s all short.

 

Late Spring Images

This is the main thoroughfare bisecting Riverton, Utah early Sunday morning.  Not a car in sight so I stepped out into the street for a little grin, grin, snap, snap of the deserted ro-wad.  That’s the Wasatch Mountains in the distance, the western-most range of the Rockies.  What you see to the right and way off in the distance behind everything is the peaks of Mt. Timpanogos.

This is an extreme close-up of the eyeball of an Arabian horse that lives next door.  She was leaning over the fence to eat the tall grass in our yard so I went out to feed her and got some good pictures.  This one got a good reflection of me in her eyeball hole.

Here she is chowin’ down

And one more just to show her beautiful smile.  She needs to learn not to chew with her mouth open.

An Idealist’s Dream

I have so many thoughts, ideas and things that make sense to me but sometimes I have trouble executing them.

What if there were a group of people who could have access to my ideas and really take them seriously?

Then CulturTree happened.  Whoa!

New Subject:

People stand strong on their principles and move forward with vigor, passion, rancor…whatever fuel gives them the power to believe.  Too often people believe what they hear or they believe little more than how they interpret headlines without understanding details and truth.  Quips and bumper stickers, signs and chants do not teach or develop understanding; they merely get attention.

What kills me is the thinking of the 99 percenters, for example.  They have a mob mentality, believing in an ideology most of them do not understand.

I love nutty people and ‘out-of-the-box’ ideas, but these people are straight-up crazy!

I say that because I’ve visited the ‘Occupy’ campers in Portland, Seattle and Las Vegas and found that they really are quite confused about what they believe.  The only thing they are certain about is that they are opposed to so much.  And the most dangerous element to their dogma is that they don’t even understand what it is they disbelieve; and that’s why they find it so easy to hate.  All they know for sure is that they are in opposition to the establishment.

So many of the Occupiers are nothing more than insignificant elements in a giant monkey wrenching mob.  Their individuality and freedoms are so easily given to those who tell them what to say and what to hate.

Of course this does not apply to all of the Occupiers, however it does apply to almost all of them to whom I have spoken.

There was one very sharp member of the Anonymous group who I met in Las Vegas and who demonstrated a good understanding of our Constitution, what freedom and liberty mean and who was even familiar with Dr. Bruce Lipton and Epigenetics.  I was impressed and we had a great conversation that lasted a couple of hours.  He even called Obama a dictator, which made me laugh, but he added that all of our Presidents are dictators.  That was the end of the conversation for me.  Those broad generalizations are counter productive.

Healthy debate is the key to enlightenment.  If more people would openly seek greater understanding and be willing to break down their misunderstandings this world would be full of truth and progress (not progressivISM).

Question everything and learn for yourself the truth of all things!

Two more images

This one I call ‘I against I’.  I made a mistake and began to fill it in with colored pencils and hated the results.  Wish I hadn’t done that!

This is a portrait of a friend of mine, Dave Norton.  I met him years ago in Provo, Utah.  He is the younger brother of one of my neighbors and we became friends.  He was only sixteen years old, I was ten years older but he had some serious life experience under his belt and he was searching for something, I found him to be a sincere and talented young kid.

My Art, My Mind

Here are a few more drawings I have from years gone by.  I have debated whether or not to share them but I decided it’s a good idea.

You can click the images for larger views.

This one I did while living in Seattle in the spring of 1992.  I was a young man and somewhat of a rebel.  I’m much smarter, or maybe just wiser these days.

This one is exactly as titled.  After going through my teens and getting into my mid twenties I was forced to confront a huge inferiority complex and admit to myself that I was insecure and scared of the world.  I was an actor playing a role of confidence and seeking thrills to mask the fear, seeking chills to mask the pain.

Where has accountability gone?

I don’t normally like to post news items as blog posts but this one got me fired up.  This issue of homosexuality is a sensitive one.  If any of you have read most of my blog you know my opinions.  If you have skimmed and not taken the time to actually understand my position you might think I’m a bigot.  That is fine with me, I am not a bigot and I don’t have animosity or hatred toward any individual.

I have problems with many prevailing philosophies, dogmas and tenets.

There is nothing wrong with standing on our principles.  We all need to stand up for what we believe.  Too many people today trade their values for the clamoring and whining of the weak, who fail to stand on any firm foundation.  They give in because of emotion, sensitivity and sympathy.  Empathy is a virtue we should all live by, but sympathizing with causes in contrast with our core values is destructive to our being.  There is a critical difference between empathy and sympathy.  Ignorance and lack of understanding lead people down paths of confusion and this is happening in the halls of academia more and more; at the elite universities that were once standards of greatness.

It has become very trite and cliche, but it is true that if we stand for nothing we will fall for anything.  United we stand; divided we fall; and how much proactive divisiveness do we see going on today?

The principles and philosophies that this nation were founded upon are as solid today as they were back then.  The problem is not the principles but the misunderstanding and misinterpretation of them by people today who allow their emotions to interfere with reason.

On to the new item that started this outburst.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110420/ap_on_re_us/us_rutgers_suicide

You can’t punish one person for the choices another person makes!  That’s just not right.  The news story reports that, in short, a Rutgers student who was an aspiring violinist had a gay trist with another man in his dorm room and the roommate caught it on a webcam.  According to the article it was a make-out session.

For anyone to believe that THIS one incident alone is what caused this young man to kill himself is completely short sighted.  This certainly was a catalyst, but was merely one piece of a much larger  puzzle that made up his life.  It doesn’t make sense to charge the roommate for the end result, an individual choice that another person made.  If you do that you have to go back throughout his life to all of the other factors and give them attention and blame as well.

If what was caught on camera was so shameful, that is an issue for the victim, not the roommate.   If we have private behaviors that we feel we must keep hidden from society then we are solely responsible for the humiliation we feel.  If we believe in what we are doing then we should stand tall in our beliefs, regardless of what society tells us.  If our actions are illegal or unethical or immoral then we will be judged for them, but again, if we believe in what we do we should stand tall in the face of ridicule.

Rutgers is way out of line. They brought Snookie in as a guest speaker and they’re punishing a kid for video taping his roommate?  There’s nothing illegal or unethical about rolling film in your own house.

We all know that this is an issue because it has to do with homosexuality.  If the victim had been making out with a fat chick (no offense to the overweight, but this is a valid argument) and then killed himself for shame it would have been observed as something out of kilter with his psychology due to HIS own choice.

I’m getting so tired of the over-sensitivity in this country. Pussification!! Where’s the grit and integrity gone?

OK, here I go into the realm of real offensive opinion — the world is a much bigger place than your imaginary bubble and the protective environment you wish you could live in.  The world is harsh and it WILL not change because we want it to. It is what it is, and always will be.  Political correctness is an illusion.   Politeness should be expected, not pandering.

There are rules, there are standards and there are laws that will not change due to our behaviors and desires.  Evolution does not work that way.  The changes that come about as a result of our behaviors have consequences, and those consequences will play out in time. We are all free to choose our path.  We are all free to choose our behavior, but we are never free to choose the consequences of our actions.

A Sliver of the Mind’s Eye

Another of my drawings.  This was done in 1993 or 1994, I’m not sure.  I really didn’t think they were of any value to me when I did them so I didn’t date them.  I’m glad I have these.  I have others somewhere that are far more spectacular, I have no clue where they are.  I hope not lost forever.  Click on the image to see the detail in a much larger version.  There’s a lot in here.  I think I drew on this thing for over a month.

The Frayed Ends of Sanity

This drawing has a lot of meaning to me.  I posted a photo of part of it in my previous bloggage after tweaking it in Photoshop a little bit for effect; but this is the original.  I love it for several reasons.  I drew this in the early winter of 1993 while working at a mental hospital.  Yup, I worked at the loony bin.  Makes sense if you think about it.  I call it The Frayed Ends of Sanity. And I was completely and totally 100% sober, no mind or mood altering substances partaken of during this time.

(drawn with ball point pen on typing paper)

Spring 2011 Photography by Vaughn Brown

Here are some recent shots I’ve clickety clicked here and there over the past month or so. The weather has been so weird this spring! Isn’t it supposed to bring us warmth and flowers? We have rain and snow. Maybe I’ll get to the turning colors next month.

This is a photograph of a part of a drawing I did about twenty years ago. I used to draw a lot but when you stop doing something for a long time you lose it. I should start to draw or paint again. It’s a good outlet.

I’ve been playing this harp for a few months now. I’m not great, but I can fake it pretty well in bursts. Just don’t ask me to play with a band because I don’t know any songs and can barely play the C major scale on the thing.

Self portrait, need I say more?

I took this from inside the train while it was rounding a corner. I likes.

This amazing shot was taken just walking down the street in Riverton after a snow storm. The sky was clearing up and the mountains looked amazing. Utah has some of the most spectacular, natural beauty this planet has to offer. What a blessing it is to witness it every day.

This is part of another of my drawings. A collage of thought and the over-active imagination of youth.

This is the guitar I’ve been playing the last few months. I wish I caught on to guitar when I was younger the way I get it now. It makes sense now that I understand more theory and scales.

Does this need an explanation? I took it at the railroad tracks looking toward the capital building.

When you zoom in on your hand and enhance it with Photoshop a lot more lines show up than you see by just looking. I wonder what it all means.

My pal Chad’s incredible, quilted maple, Ibanez hollow body. I love this guitar, it sounds as good as it looks.

And last but not least…what does that even mean? These are my friends from the SLC band, Alias Code. L to R: Brian, Wes, Kajol, Joey, Chris. Amazing band, energy and talent.

Spencer Gee recently replaced Kajol as the vocalist and the band changed its name to The Stranger Beside Me.  I like the name a lot.

Daniel Johnston

Daniel Johnston is one of my favorite artists.  If you’re unfamiliar with his work, to see one of his drawings or listen to one of his recordings you likely wouldn’t be terribly impressed.  But after hearing more of his work it becomes apparent that Daniel Johnston is an inspired visionary.  He is not the best performer in comparison to some more accomplished artists but if you have an understanding of what Daniel Johnston is about and what he lives for, his performances take on a whole new meaning.

Art and music flow from Daniel like water down the Nile.  He is unstoppable and it is as though he can’t help but create music and art.  He has many recurring themes throughout his art, mostly of battles between good and evil and the same themes run through his songs.  Much of what he sings about has to do with his affection for a never gotten love interest named Lori.   He met her in his youth and followed her with a video camera as his way of worshiping and admiring her.  He did get her to say, “I love you Danny” but that was only to satisfy him and she eventually went on to marry an undertaker who he used as the subject of many songs.

His mother would lecture him endlessly about his slothfulness and call him an unprofitable servant of the Lord (he would call himself an unserviceable prophet) as he spent all of his time drawing, writing and recording.  Daniel grew up with faith in his religion and a profound fear of hell and damnation.  He spoke often of Satan and the torment of the devil in his songs and in his conversations and lived in fear of losing his soul.  One therapist said about Daniel, after analyzing his drawings, that he is surely going to heaven because it’s obvious he has already been to hell.

Daniel finally realized one of his life long dreams by accident when MTV profiled the Austin music scene in the mid eighties.  Dan worked his way in front of the cameras, was interviewed and eventually given a spot live on MTV performing his songs.  The world was finally introduced to Daniel Johnston and his career began to bloom. But Daniel perceived the experience as a dichotomy or paradox in that MTV was serving the devil but there he was on MTV, just like he said he would as a kid.

When Dan was still pretty young he began to develop bi-polar disorder which became so severe he spent a lot of time in and out of many mental institutions.  He changed suddenly from a happy and care free young boy to a troubled and self loathing youth.

When he was in New York City spending time with the members of Sonic Youth he had a severe episode and was again sent to a mental facility.  He was accidentally released on a clerical error and found himself at CBGB that evening and opened up for the LA band fIREHOSE.

Daniel Johnston had many extreme episodes of mania where he would essentially lose touch with reality.  One time he was in his father’s private airplane, his father piloting and he turned the engine off and threw the keys out the window.  The airplane crash landed in the trees and both were uninjured.  Another time he whacked his manager over the head with a lead pipe three times.  Daniel has been quoted as saying, “I whammed him, I whammed him good“.  After these episodes he again found himself committed to mental institutions where he realized the horror of what he had done.

As Dan got older and into his forties he went back to living with his parents, taking his meds and focusing on writing and playing music.  Dan tours the world and elsewhere performing his music to the delight of devoted fans.  Sometimes his shows are sub-par and sometimes they are purely brilliant.  True fans love his performances either way.

God bless Daniel Johnston.  The poor man has been tormented all of his life and he has produced some amazing art and beautiful songs.  Over 400 artists have covered his music including Beck, fIREHOSE, Sonic Youth, Death Cab for Cutie, Tom Waits, David Bowie, Built to Spill and Pearl Jam.

Daniel’s life has been chronicled in the movie “The Devil and Daniel Johnston“.  It spans over twenty years of Daniel’s life as he had recorded most of his life on video and audio tape.  Learn more about Daniel Johnston at his fan site rejectedunknown.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3615X2qOA-0